The Lost History Graph Worksheet
The Lost History Graph is a tool designed to help you visualize and understand the emotional impact of the losses you’ve experienced throughout your life. It shows significant moments when loss occurred and how those moments may have shaped or altered the course of your personal journey. This exercise allows you to reflect on the emotional intensity of each loss in a concrete way. Take your time with this exercise, being gentle and compassionate with yourself as you explore these memories. If needed, reach out for support from a therapist or trusted friend.
Instructions
Prepare Your Paper. Start by using a blank sheet of paper and laying it horizontally. Across the middle of the paper, draw a horizontal line. This line will serve as the timeline of your life, representing your journey from birth to the present. The horizontal line will be the foundation for marking key points in time, with significant moments and experiences placed along it.
Mark Key Points on the Timeline.
Birth: Place a dot at the far left end of the line to mark your birth.
Current Date: Place a dot at the far right end of the line to mark the present moment.
Half of Your Life: Place a dot in the center of the line to represent the midpoint of your life.
Dawn of Conscious Memory: Add a dot where you believe your earliest memory fits. This doesn’t need to be related to a loss but helps frame the timeline of your life.
Identify and Place Losses on the Timeline. Reflect on the significant losses you’ve encountered in your life. These can include the death of a loved one, the end of a relationship, a life transition, or any other meaningful loss. For each loss, place a dot on the timeline at the point when it occurred. Next to each dot, write a brief description to identify the loss, such as “Grandparent’s passing,” “End of a marriage,” or “Loss of a job.” This process helps you see the ways in which these events have shaped your emotional journey over time.
Indicate Emotional Intensity. Once you have placed your losses on the timeline, consider the emotional intensity associated with each one. For each loss, draw a perpendicular line that extends either above or below the timeline. The length of the line should reflect the intensity of the emotional response you experienced at that time. A longer line represents a higher intensity of grief or emotional response, while a shorter line reflects a more subdued emotional reaction. This visual representation allows you to better understand the emotional peaks and valleys throughout your life.
Share with a Partner. When ready, share your Lost History Graph with a partner or small group, if comfortable.
Example
Conclusion
The Lost History Graph is a powerful tool for gaining insight into the long-term impact of grief. By visually mapping your emotional journey, you can clearly see how losses have shaped and influenced the course of your life. This exercise can also help you identify opportunities for healing and growth as you reflect on the intensity and significance of each loss. By acknowledging the pain and finding meaning in your experiences, you can move toward a place of healing and integration.
